day four= more adventures

8-30-09

so this is the last day before classes start. some friends and i went for another walk to make sure we knew our way around.

i took this picture in one of the campus parks.

i cant stop talking about the fact that i love this place. it's so beautiful. and as cheesy as it may sound, the people are beautiful too. everyone is very friendly and polite; everyone is so eager to help others. this is my kind of school.

and believe it or not, i have only met 5 guys: two of which were gay. idk...im having such a good time with the girls on my floor the guys dont even matter.....imagine that.

<3

day three= exploring

8-29-09

after transitions me and a few new friends went for a walk around campus.

i LOVE this campus. its so beautiful and the landscaping is amazing; great for taking pictures.

the bell tower is the tower of the Kirkoff building, which is kind of the central building of the school. it rings every hour and then it plays a song.

<3

day two = transitions

7-28-09

yes the gang is all here...some of my stuffed animals were still upset that i didnt bring them, but they will get over it. lol

second day of transitions which is like a freshman seminar type deal.

boring as hell. but i made friends :) this is a picture of us before we hit the club

<3

day one= move in

8-27-09

this is my desk....peep the picture of kristen in 7th grade. lol

i really love Grand valley. its great. this school was made for me.

<3

the countdown

so i know i said i wouldnt have too many words in my blog, but forget that. you guys know i have too much to say. i will still try to upload a picture for everyday once i start school. oh, by the way:

*public service announcement*

*i think since we are going to diffrent schools and we might not talk to each other as much, its important that everyone comments on each new blog entry written, so that we know everyone is reading and keeping up with the blogs.*

okay. back to whatever i was talking about...which was nothing...

last week was my "sad week" if you couldnt tell from my previous entry. i cried just about everyday. i was really stressed and sad and worried. I wanted to spend time with people, but i felt like i was just going to leave them forever, so i didnt hang out with anyone. i knew i would miss my family too, but instead of talking to them i just hid in my room. and cried. all week.

luckily that week is over. I told myself i could have one week of sulking and sappy songs. that was it. on Sunday i got it all out my system. I faced the fact that i would have to leave for school, that things would be better once i got adjusted, and that i needed to embrace the changes that would take place. As strange as it may sound i knew something was going to happen that would make me want to leave bolingbrook forever...i was correct.

monday night i found out that he has a new girlfriend. to say the least, i was highly upset. i wish i could say that i was happy for him, but im not. it's good he is moving on, but i honestly didnt expect him to move onto someone new 2 weeks after we broke up.

i feel salty.

i feel like a fool.

i feel like a number.

i feel like i lost the game.

i feel like i have been thrown away.

Knowing that the person who was the focus of my senior year and summer was moving on from me was enough to make me want to leave bolingbrook and not look back. Its kinda sad, but this situation really burned me. I know i sound irrational, but its how i feel at the moment. i wish i could just erase this from existence.

i know i will get over it. and im sure in about a month, he is not going to matter. until then, im counting down the days until i leave.

I cant believe im letting a person i dont even "like" dictate my feelings.

pathetic? maybe. real? of course.

on a much higher note Candy Coated Candice and Kristen the Great are already at school. Dearest Nida goes to school tomorrow; i know she will do fine. i just feel bad for those sexy guys..hehehe dont hurt 'em, nida. :)

<3

blank.

geez man.

i dont know what to think about the fact that i am leaving everyone i know and love and going off to a new place.

i feel sick to my stomach as i write this.

Candice is gone, and within the next week we will all be seperated (sniffle sniffle).

this week i have felt many emotions, and joy has honestly not been one of them.

my family has been working my last nerves...i wish i could be on my own; yet i dont want to leave them.

packing all my stuff up is alot of work...leaving my room to live with someone else in a smaller room scares me.

I am so stressed about everything; my mom thinks the reason my period is so irregular is because of stress...we went to the doctor and she agrees. My skin wont let me catch a break either. i break out because im stressed; im stressed because i break out.

im tired. i stay up late at night thinking (emo i realize. shut up) about how things are going to change and what new people i will meet. i keep wondering if my professors are going to be as nice as the school brochure claims they are. i lay there and i try to turn off my mind so i can get some decent sleep; i try to get my mind to go blank.

when something is far off, you cant wait to taste it, but once the moment you think you have been waiting for is finally there, you dont know what to do with it.

our entire senior year revolved around the fact that "i wont have to be in this dumb ass school anymore.." "i wont have to go to high school next year.." "im so done with all these little kids in this stupid building.." "next year im going to COLLEGE and i wont have to be bothered with this shit."

we didint think about the fact that we would have new shit to be bothered with. like having to build new friendships, even though the ones you already had were perfectly fine. or leaving your family that loves you till no end, even though you dont like them most of the time. or learning you way around a new campus.

sorry i am being such a downer right now, i wish i could just let my mind go blank so i wouldnt have to think about any of this.

<3

memory lane

remember this? hehe

So as Kristen reminded me in her last entry, we need to keep updating our blogs so that the creation of this project isnt in vain.

I uploaded these to highlight some things from our senior year...awww look at us..high schoolers..hehehe..more to come.

<3